life's little ironies.... it figures that the first time i would liek a guy in soooo long it would be just a couple of months before leaving. and effectively those couple of months are just about one month cos im headed of to khi n a couple of days. damn u nim why the hell did u have to introduce us and if u had to introduce us why the hell couldnt u have done it sooner :P and it also figures that when i like a guy and cant do anything about it, he also likes me.... go figure! i mean for the longest time ive been insane over a guy with whom nothing could ever happen. and i guess there was soem security in that.... i had accepted that nothing could happen and i was ok with that ( most of the time :) ) no entangelments, no messy issues. and me being the type of person that i am who thinks waaaay to much abt stuff liek this and gets my head in a twist.... figures that this new guy is also like that :P scorpios zindabad!
emotional detachement is not something i am capable of. i hate having to hold back my feelings and emotions. if i feel something for soemone then i want to be able to express it. i spent so many years of my life trying to supress my depression and it screwed me over so bad. it was finally when i started letting it out that i finally managed to get over it. couple of after effects of being a depressive for like one third of my life..... i hate being unhappy... i have to avoid anything that makes me sad or depressed, have to avoid it at all cost. and hence i dotn want any messy entaglements with any guy.... i dont want to be unhappy over a guy. im never going to let that happen to me again. second effect..... i have to espress my emotions.... i cannot hold them back. i cannot be emotinally detached. if that mean expressing my unhappiness or unhappiness or anger or whatever. i have to feel it to the max and i have to let it out. and if that means that when i am emotionally involved and its not a good idea to express it..... i'll try to hold it in and that depresses me. gotta express it.....
..... i like this guy.
3 comments:
So go ahead and have a mad fling... tell him you'll see him when you get back... and life's wierd that way, you never know you just might OR something better might come along and you'll go for that.
Point is dont sacrifice the NOW for some unforeseeable future! go get him Tiger~! :P And let the future take care of itself! ;)
Best of Luck! :D
hehe i just might take the advice.... the only thing is that im going to khi today :) well maybe i'll follow up on it when i get back or maybe by the time i get back i'll be over him :D
go for it =)
goodluck.
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